LifeStance Insights

What is Pebbling? Originating from the concept of the “Penguin Love Language,” where penguins bring the perfect pebbles back to their partners, pebbling refers to the small, seemingly insignificant actions or comments that accumulate over time to create a significant emotional impact. In essence, it is the practice of giving small tokens of affection to show someone you care about them. Although a relatively new term and trend often discussed on social media in the context of dating, pebbling has applications that go beyond romantic relationships. Examples of pebbling include sending a funny meme, giving a small gift, offering a flower, sharing a motivational quote, or scheduling regular check-ins with loved ones. Licensed Professional Counselor Jeffrey Marshall, who specializes in family therapy, including parent-child dynamics, applies pebbling to improve communication, foster empathy, and model healthy emotional behaviors. Penguin Pebbling in Family Communication...

1. Prediction: Virtual care does not mean virtual only care – hybrid care may become the standard. The shift toward hybrid care may accelerate, driven by evolving patient preferences and demand. A recent report from Deloitte found consumers are nearly evenly divided in their preferences for virtual versus in-person mental health care, with 38 percent favoring in-person services and 35 percent preferring virtual care. As of December 2024, approximately 71 percent of LifeStance’s sessions were virtual and 29 percent were in-person, with many patients taking advantage of both care settings. In-person visits make up about 39 percent of new patient appointments. While telehealth remains a convenient choice, demand for in-person care is steadily rising, driven by clinical appropriateness and quality clinical standards for safe care delivery. Over time, I personally expect to see a trend toward a greater proportion of in-person care, and the providers who can deliver both virtual and in-person care effectively will stand out....

As a psychologist who works with many patients experiencing relationship issues, I find attachment theory to be one of the most enlightening frameworks for understanding how we connect with others. The patterns of intimacy, trust, and emotional connection we exhibit in adulthood often stem from attachment styles formed through early interactions with primary caregivers. These styles profoundly influence how we navigate our relationships. Attachment styles are crucial to understand because they influence not just relationships but, believe it or not, even our relationship with food. The four primary attachment styles—secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant—are shaped by specific caregiving experiences. Understanding these patterns can provide invaluable insights into the dynamics and challenges we face in our adult relationships, offering a pathway for healing, growth, and tools to have healthier interactions. Attachment styles are formed during infancy based on the quality of our relationships with our earliest caregivers. Researchers believe these patterns develop within the first year of life, as early as six months old. Each attachment style is thought to emerge in response to specific caregiving behaviors: Secure Attachment develops when caregivers are consistently responsi...

The holidays are a mix of joy and stress, especially when spending time with family. Home, where we first learned to connect with others, can feel like a time machine. Old patterns resurface, and unresolved tensions may bubble up, making it feel like you’re reporting from a storm. Family gatherings can reveal how childhood relationships still shape us. The way we interact with family today often mirrors habits from the past, offering a chance to reflect and grow. A Note of Caution Trauma is one of the most significant life events, with lasting effects that can shape how we react and cope. By reflecting on the past with curiosity, we can uncover both the strategies we’ve developed to adapt and the traumatic experiences that continue to affect us in profound ways. These moments can trigger intense reactions, and addressing them often requires the support of therapy. Therapy provides a safe space to explore and process these experiences, which can sometimes resurface during fami...

Recent statistics show that pornography consumption is widespread in the United States, with millions engaging daily. Pornhub, one of the largest adult websites, ranks as the fourth most visited website in the world, highlighting the easy accessibility of online pornography. Porn addiction is a serious issue that profoundly affects the individual struggling with it. It can lead to a host of personal challenges, including reduced self-esteem, feelings of guilt or shame, and increased anxiety or depression. The addictive cycle often consumes significant time and energy, detracting from work, hobbies, and meaningful social connections. Over time, this dependency can distort an individual’s understanding of intimacy, create unrealistic expectations about sex, and diminish satisfaction with real-life experiences, making it harder to form genuine emotional and physical connections. For couples, the impact of porn addiction is even more painful. Trust, a cornerstone of any relationship, is often shattered when the addicted partner’s behavior comes to light. Emotional intimacy suffers as the addicted individual becomes more withdrawn or disconnected, leaving the other partner feeling neglected, rejected, or inadequate. Sexual intimacy can also deteriorate, as unrealistic ideals shaped by pornography interfere with na...

The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, reconnecting with friends, and cherishing moments with family. It’s a season filled with gatherings, celebrations, and opportunities to strengthen relationships. However, for individuals struggling with social anxiety disorder, this time of year can feel anything but joyful. Instead of excitement, the thought of holiday events often brings overwhelming fear, stress, and a deep sense of dread for these individuals. Navigating crowded gatherings, engaging in small talk, or even just being in the spotlight at family functions can be immensely challenging, making the holidays a season of anxiety rather than connection. Two LifeStance clinicians, Jennifer Farrell, LMFT, and Richard Carey, Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner, offer helpful tips for managing social anxiety during the holiday season. They provide practical strategies for navigating social situations and point out symptoms to look out for that may indicate the need for professional help when anxiety significantly impacts one’s daily life or overall well-being. According to Farrell, social anxiety stems from “an overwhelming fear of being judged, rejected, or embarrassing oneself.” This intense fear often leads to avoidant behaviors, such as skipping events altogether or limiting interactions. For so...

My name is Amber Hulgan, and I’m a licensed therapist practicing in Oklahoma. But before I became a therapist, I was simply a daughter who experienced a devastating loss. In 2002, when I was 28 years old, my mom died by suicide. She was only 46. My life has since been divided into two pieces: the years before her death and everything after. My mother battled bipolar disorder and depression for much of her life. Her early years were filled with trauma, and that pain lingered, making her illness even harder to bear. She had moments of light—times when her laughter would fill the room and her energy was contagious. But the darkness she carried was deep, and it eventually consumed her. I want to share my story to help others recognize the warning signs of suicide, navigate the pain of loss, and understand how to intervene effectively. I wasn’t a therapist back then. I didn’t know what to do. I tried my best to help her by reaching out to others, but she felt unloved and like a burden, even though nothing could have been further from the truth. I miss her in ways I couldn’t even fathom back then, and 22 years later, her loss is still a part of me. Losing someone to suicide is different from losing them to illness, old age, or even an accident. The grief is wrapped in shame and unanswered questions, though there’s...